dilbert 2017 day to day calendar

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What S Your Poo Telling You

Author : Josh Richman
ISBN : 0811857824
Genre : Health & Fitness
File Size : 21. 15 MB
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With universal appeal (everyone poops, after all), this witty, illustrated description of over two dozen dookies (each with a medical explanation written by a doctor) details what one can learn about health and well-being by studying what's in the bowl. A floater? It's probably due to a buildup of gas. Now think back on last night's dinner, a burrito perhaps? . . .All the greatest hits are here: The Log Jam, The Glass Shard, The Deja Poo, The Hanging Chad . . . the list goes on. Sidebars, trivia, over 60 euphemisms for number 2, and unusual case histories all make this the ultimate bathroom reader. Who knew you could learn so much from your poo?

Live Right And Find Happiness Although Beer Is Much Faster

Author : Dave Barry
ISBN : 9781101631508
Genre : Humor
File Size : 30. 46 MB
Format : PDF
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During the course of living (mumble, mumble) years, Dave Barry has learned much of wisdom,* (*actual wisdom not guaranteed) and he is eager to pass it on—to the next generation, the generation after that, and to those idiots who make driving to the grocery store in Florida a death-defying experience. In brilliant, brand-new, never-before-published pieces, Dave passes on home truths to his new grandson and to his daughter Sophie, who will be getting her learner’s permit in 2015 (“So you’re about to start driving! How exciting! I’m going to kill myself”). He explores the hometown of his youth, where the grown-ups were supposed to be uptight fifties conformists, but seemed to have a lot of un-Mad Men-like fun, unlike Dave’s own Baby Boomer generation, which was supposed to be wild and crazy, but somehow turned into neurotic hover-parents. He dives into everything from the inanity of cable news and the benefits of Google Glass (“You will look like a douchebag”) to the loneliness of high school nerds (“You will never hear a high school girl say about a boy, in a dreamy voice, ‘He’s so sarcastic!’”), from the perils of home repair to firsthand accounts of the soccer craziness of Brazil and the just plain crazy craziness of Vladimir Putin’s Russia (“He stares at the camera with the expression of a man who relaxes by strangling small furry animals”), and a lot more besides. By the end, if you do not feel wiser, richer in knowledge, more attuned to the universe . . . we wouldn’t be at all surprised. But you’ll have had a lot to laugh about! From the Hardcover edition.

F In Exams

Author : Richard Benson
ISBN : 9781452138572
Genre : Humor
File Size : 44. 53 MB
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F stands for "funny" in this perfect gift for students or anyone who has ever had to struggle through a test and needs a good laugh. Celebrating the creative side of failure in a way we can all relate to, F in Exams gathers the most hilarious and inventive test answers provided by students who, faced with a question they have no hope of getting right, decide to have a little fun instead. Whether in science (Q: What is the highest frequency noise that a human can register? A: Mariah Carey), the humanities (Q: What did Mahatma Gandhi and Genghis Khan have in common? A: Unusual names), math, or other subjects, these 250 entries prove that while everyone enjoys the spectacle of failure, it's even sweeter to see a FAIL turn into a WIN.

Corn Flakes With John Lennon

Author : Robert Hilburn
ISBN : 9781594869211
Genre : Music
File Size : 38. 84 MB
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A rock critic reflects on the ways in which he has changed, and been changed by, the subjects he has covered, in a book that is also an account of his adventures in rock and roll, with such figures as Bob Dylan, Michael Jackson, and Johnny Cash.

Optimism Sounds Exhausting

Author : Scott Adams
ISBN : 9781449474980
Genre : Comics & Graphic Novels
File Size : 85. 60 MB
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Dilbert, the cubicle-dwelling drone, is at his satirical best with this new collection of cartoons. Dilbert has managed to keep up with technology like iPads and Twitter over the years, as well as advanced systems like the Disaster Preparedness Plan that has its followers eating the crumbs from their keyboards. It doesn’t get any more sophisticated than that. It’s an office code violation to be this good after so many years, but Dilbert keeps doing what he does best: passive-aggressively out-witting his superiors and exercising conflict avoidance. And he is so good. No wonder office drones and workforce automatons alike can’t resist the cold embrace of Dilbert’s workplace.

Your New Job Title Is Accomplice

Author : Scott Adams
ISBN : 9781449432775
Genre : Humor
File Size : 59. 4 MB
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As fresh a look at the inanity of office life as it brought to the comics pages when it first appeared in 1989, this 40th AMP Dilbert collection comically confirms to the working public that we all really know what's going on. Our devices might be more sophisticated, our software and apps might be more plentiful, but when it gets down to interactions between the worker bees and the clueless in-controls, discontent and sarcasm rule, as only Dilbert can proclaim.

Go Add Value Someplace Else

Author : Scott Adams
ISBN : 9781449452261
Genre : Humor
File Size : 49. 3 MB
Format : PDF, Kindle
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Does Dilbert creator Scott Adams have a hidden camera in your office--or is he just completely in tune with the inept managers, wacky office politics, and nonsensical leadership practices that seem to run wild at your company? Stop looking for the camera. Dilbert has become a hugely successful strip because Adams feels your pain. How? Because this former employee of a major telecommunications company has been there. He's seen the road to failure firsthand. And he knows that to successfully navigate the ludicrous world of business, you can't expect common sense to prevail, you need to keep a sense of humor, and above all, you must always be ready to blame the other guy. The strip's enormous popularity stems from the fact that its millions of readers easily identify with the crazy plots and wacky characters found within the corporate environment. Sure, most companies don't have a bespectacled engineer with a tie permanently curled up, a cynical talking dog, and a manager with two pointy tufts of hair. But it's the outrageous things Dilbert characters do and say that leave readers knowingly nodding their heads and, of course, laughing uproariously. The antics of Dilbert's cast are based not only on Adams's own corporate experiences, but on the numerous e-mails he receives each day about the office dramas of his devoted fans.

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